Remembering All Levels of Fitness and Goals

I’ve written a post similar to this one before, but I felt like I wanted to discuss this topic again in light of the new program that is beginning at our boot camp. We have a 6 week fat loss program called the “Sexy in 6” which continually proves to provide much success toward the women who join; for no other reason than they put in a solid effort and commitment, and keep their goals in front of them at all times as they get closer and closer to success.

Yesterday I decided I was going to participate in the program, and a requirement of the program is to record your weight and your measurements. Truth be told, I stepped on the scale for the first time in months and had a bitter taste of reality. There is a 15 pound difference from where I was in the summer to where I am now.

Yesterday I was so disappointed in myself, but today I woke up feeling more determined than ever to change what I saw. This, I have come to realize, was inevitable. Since the summer when I began to be so overwhelmed with the changes in my life, the regular bad habits crept back in:
wine, beer, deep fried foods, chips, ice cream, and NO consistent physical activity.

Disgusting for a person who knows better but…

I am human and made unhealthy choices when stress dominated my life.

I had an interesting experience yesterday while I was taking my measurements, one that has definitely happened to me before. A woman from the program caught sight of me, and stated
“If I had a body like that I wouldn’t need to be on this program”

Now, as flattering as that may be the reality is every body has their own goals they are working towards
And that’s exactly now I responded.

I know as a female we sometimes use comments like that as compliments for other women, but I have always found it to be completely the opposite. It is so important to validate ANY goal that a woman makes with regards to her health and fitness level. Because otherwise, what we’re saying is that they’re done. Perfect. No need to set any goals, or challenge themselves in any way to be a better version of themselves.

And that is simply not true.

There are always ways to improve yourself, and to be a healthier, stronger, more confident, deserving version of you.

I’m going to propose a challenge to the women out there today:

Try to embrace others who may have goals similar or different than the ones you have set. Try not to pass judgement, or assume that body size or higher numbers on the scale makes a person more deserving of working towards change in their lives. Try to remember that every one has their own demons they’re working through, and what you can do is stand behind them and work with them to reach their full potential; Their full potential, not yours or anyone elses.

Because after all, that’s what makes being united as women so inspiring. We’re all different and have our own strengths. So it should only make sense that our goals may look different as well.

So yes, I do have some weight loss goals added to my list of fitness accomplishments for 2014:

*10 pounds by Feb. 22nd

*15 total by April 1st.

*Fitness Photoshoot in May

*1/2 Marathon at the end of May.

What have I started to put in action to reach those goals?

NO
Alcohol for the next 2 months
Chips, Ice Cream, or other JUNK for 2 Months (once it’s out of my system it’s less likely I’ll be craving them excessively like before)
Sitting on my ass 5-6 days a week

YES
High protein, and Complex Carb intake. After two weeks, taking in carbs ONLY post workout (healthy carbs… not chips haha)
Packing more lunches for school
Making more dinners at night that carry over for lunch!
Running 3-5 K twice a week for the month of Jan–> Increasing to 5-8K for February
Kickboxing once a week
Train (and work out) at Boot camp once a week (sometimes twice)
Gym 2- 3 times (depending on schedule and what I’ve also done during the week)
Begin morning yoga routine again

MY ACCOUNTABILITY
My friend, co-trainer, and fitness partner: Rosie
THIS BLOG–> I’m putting it out there for you all to read to know I’m bloody serious

So there you have it peeps. I’ve made my goals, I’ve posted them for others to see and now it’s time to start my journey towards being a better, healthier version of me.

The guy in the picture is Dan, He owns this baby. I'm on the right. Rosie is on the left.

The guy in the picture is Dan, He owns this baby. I’m on the right. Rosie is on the left.

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Validation without Judgement: Remembering to Appreciate All Personal Demons

The other day I caught wind of a discussion occurring among the women at our boot camp and it really got me thinking:
If we (women) know that there is something with our health, strength or fitness levels we’re working on, why is it so difficult to comprehend that other women may have something they’re working on as well? 

I hate my stomach. Yes, I know I’ve mentioned this fact before but I’ll tell you right now if I were to mention this to a group of women (new women who don’t really know me) I would get the following responses:
“You’re crazy, you don’t need to loose anymore weight”
Let me be clear. Wanting a toned, defined mid-section at my fitness level has nothing to do with me loosing more weight.
“You’re already so tiny! How could you be unhappy with your body?”
Who said I was unhappy? I have areas that I want to develop & make stronger, but that doesn’t mean I sit at home draining energy, pining for my body to miraculously change and be perfect.
“I would kill for your size, there is no way you were ever mine”
Flattering, but so far from reality. Do NOT, EVER, NEVER set your goals based on who and what someone else is. YOU are YOU. Not anyone else, so stop comparing. My “size” for me may not even be healthy for you, OR my size may just be the tip of the iceberg for your own capabilities. So please, admire my strength, dedication, motivation & determination. Please do not admire physical (materialistic) attributes.

Anyways, back on track.

As a teacher, you are trained to value your students strengths and what they feel are their weaknesses. If they tell you they “suck at reading” you always validate their feelings, and then work with them to figure out what it is that makes reading challenging for them, and how we can work together to improve that particular skill. The same applies with women and their fitness/ body images woes.

It doesn’t matter whether a woman weighing 200 lbs  walks in and tells me they need to loose weight for her wedding dress, or a woman weighing 115 lbs comes in, distressed about her thighs. It is my job as a fitness professional — and a compassionate human being– to validate those feelings, and work together with her to figure out how we can attain those goals.

I believe, as women, we have the tendency to judge other women without separating ourselves from our own emotions. Instead of pausing and considering that a woman who may be taller, smaller, prettier, louder, more confident, older, younger, etc. than ourselves might have some of their own “demons”, we very quickly shut them down with what is disguised as polite responses.

The responses I gave from my own experiences are just some examples I’ve heard tossed around between women in all areas of my life!

Now, what I am sure of…

We don’t mean these responses to be anything but politely disguised statements that are supposed to remind the other women how beautiful they really are. Which, to a degree– is nice.

However.

I’m willing to bet there are some women reading this right now, who have been given these responses when they hesitantly opened up about areas of their fitness/ health/ body they would like to improve on.

It SUCKS.

There is nothing worse than wanting to open up to friends about fitness & personal goals, and being shut down with a blanket statement about how you are perfect and you shouldn’t worry so much about those things.

My request for you readers today is this:
Please validate any of your female friends, colleagues, workout partners insecurities.
Please take the time to let go of your personal judgements on someone else when your perception of them is something different then their own.
And finally,
When you’re tempted to give those blanket statements, try one of these instead:
“I’m surprised that you have that area you’re uncomfortable with! What is it about it that makes you feel that way?”

“How do you think you could take some steps to achieving that goal?”

Thanks for taking the time to follow, my wonderful readers.
Have a great night, and remember:
It’s okay to have fitness goals, no matter what shape or size you are. As long as you are healthy and taking steps to continually grow, you are on track for success!